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Gift of life his legacy

Grant McArthur
Heraldsun, March 16, 2007

In his prime: Robert Graham.
Picture: Lawrence Pinder/Leader Community Newspaper

A fully conscious father used his final moments to save the lives of five strangers as he asked for his life-support machine to be turned off. Robert Graham's final gift saw him become only the second Australian and the first Victorian to donate multiple organs after his heart stopped beating.

The 55-year-old Eltham father broke his neck in a cycling accident and was kept alive on life support at the Austin Hospital. But while asking for the ventilator keeping him alive to be removed, the Warrandyte High School teacher had no hesitation in giving new life to others.

Elissa Vomero said her family was proud that in his emotional final hours her stepfather had thought of helping others. "When I said goodbye I told him I was so proud, and he was the best man I had ever known," she said.

"He was brave and strong and courageous."

Most organ donors are brain-dead and prior written consent is used to determine their wish to donate organs. But only Mr Graham's heart had stopped, and he was able to convey his wishes personally. Mr Graham had been paralysed from the neck down but was able to communicate by nodding his head. A breathing tube prevented him speaking.

LifeGift medical director Dr Bill Silvester said living relative kidney transplants were common, but it was extremely rare for a person to be able to give conscious consent to remove other organs for transplant.

"I greatly admire the generosity of both the patient and his family to be prepared to consider donating organs at a time when they are in the midst of their own grief over the fact he is dying and they are about to lose him," Dr Silvester said.

"He made the decision very willingly. He was very pleased to be able to have an opportunity to donate his organs."

Mr Graham had previously expressed his wish to donate his organs by signing up to the Australian Organ Donor Register. But Dr Silvester said the courage he and his family had shown in his final hours underlined his determination to help others.

Visit your Medicare office or call 1800 777 203 to register with the Australian Organ Donor Register.

Original article

Robert Ian Graham, 5 June 1951 - 2 March 2007

Robert Ian Graham was born to Irene and Peter Graham on 5th June 1951 at the Royal Women’s Hospital. The family lived in Montmorency and Rob attended Montmorency Primary School and then Eltham High School. He completed year 12 in 1969 and then, ignoring his father’s advice to be a builder, headed off to Latrobe University to complete a Bachelor of Agriculture and Diploma of Education and later a Bachelor of Education.

He developed his passion for sport in his teens and played cricket for Montmorency as a middle order batsman and leg spin bowler, being a member of their 1971/72 premiership team and their 1974/75 runner up team. He played half forward flank for Montmorency, having been captain of their under 17 and under 19 teams. He was regarded by his team mates as an outstanding sportsman. Even then he was renowned as a fitness fanatic and when his team mates were having a drink after a game he would be off on a run. He also played golf at the Heidelberg Golf Club and started running marathons in the 1970’s, duathlons, triathlons and then in the mid eighties, he borrowed a bike from Andy Jewell and his passion for cycling took off.

Rob started teaching in the early 1970’s and has been teaching for 35 years, first at Williamstown High School, followed by Thomastown High and then Warrandyte Secondary College in the mid eighties.

He married Georgina Young in May 1975 and son Adam was born in July 1983. The marriage was dissolved in 1989. Although he first met Julie in 1987 when she joined the staff at Warrandyte, it wasn’t until 1993 that he made his move. He was a slow mover apparently. Julie and Rob were married on the 18th September 1994, the date being carefully selected to avoid the triathlons on the 11 September and the 25 September.

I gradually came to know Rob over a long period of years without ever meeting him. I was on the Montmorency High School Council with his father Peter, well known for his service to the Montmorency and Eltham communities, and then Peter would wander past of a Saturday afternoon while Wilma and I were watching Lower Plenty Football Club and we learned of his son Rob who at that stage was a gun triathlete.

Other connections with the family were through my eldest son Michael who, would you believe went to his sister Heather’s 8th birthday party, my nephew Alan who was in the same year as Rob at Eltham High School and my brother in law Mervyn who was in Rotary with Peter. So although I had never met him previously, I felt I already knew him when I joined Eastern Veterans. I am sure that likewise, Rob knew me.

Those of you who have partners who are cyclists will know that cycling is an addictive activity and Rob was certainly one of the addicted. Regularly riding to school, or in the his early days, running and then taking his first classes in his running shorts, racing of a Saturday afternoon and then riding to Kinglake or Strathewen of a Sunday morning.

Rob was an elite Australian triathlete, and I believe Australian champion in his age group. I am told that in his early racing days with Eastern, when he was still racing triathlons, he would head off with Greg Morgan after the race for a training run.

Rob was the sort of cyclist that I hate, but nevertheless long to be. My idea of cycle race is to ride around for an hour or so and have a sprint over the last few hundred metres. Those racing against Rob, know that was not his idea of a race. The slightest easing up of the bunch, or a slight incline would be enough for Rob to put in an attack and use his outstanding time trial skills. Sometimes it would pay off, but other times it wouldn’t. In either case those racing against him knew that they had had a race and that Rob had given it his best shot. At the end of the race he would have a wry smile of satisfaction, knowing that he had made them work hard for a win.

He loved hills, the steeper and longer the better, and likewise windy conditions. That low crouching style of his, cut through the wind and didn’t give anyone sitting on his wheel much of an advantage. In our ride in his memory last Saturday at Casey Fields, and with a wind that he would have loved, it is clear that he has passed on those same genes to Adam. Adam cruised away effortlessly from the bunch after a couple of laps and opened up a huge gap.

Some of us were privileged to see Rob’s last race with Northern at National Boulevard on February 25. Although crit racing was not his favourite pastime, the Northern crit circuits suited him. Nice wide roads, no tight corners and invariably strong, relentless winds. He made a solo breakaway early in the race and he was eventually joined by Michael Hartman and Phil Cavaleri. In the last lap, another attack, and Rob was perhaps a hundred metres in front as he crossed the line with that same smile of satisfaction. This was a classic Rob Graham race, attack, attack again and again if you have to.

The same tactics nearly came good in the 2006 Royce Bennett Memorial Handicap. The scratch bunch had swept up the field including Rob’s 2 minute bunch and were seemingly ambling to the finish, with every one keeping a watchful eye on the sprinters. With the slowing of pace, Rob saw his chance and attacked on the last climb and had a handy lead coming around the last corner, but unfortunately he was caught just on the line and beaten by the barest of margins. It would have been fitting if Rob had his name on the trophy of another Eastern legend, Royce Bennett.

Rob has an impressive list of Eastern Road Championships, first in mens 50 to 54 from 2001 until 2006, he missed out in 2002 when he didn’t ride because he had the flu. His real love and forte was the time trial, in 2003 and 2004 he was third overall, 5th in 2005 and 4th in 2006. Bear in mind this was against fields of around 100 riders from an age of 35 up. In the 2002 World Masters Games he came 7th in the time trial in his age group. The South Pacific Time Trial Championships at Maryborough at Easter, were another happy hunting ground for Rob. He won gold in his age group in 2006 and was third fastest overall, being only 25 seconds slower than the fastest rider.

Rob was a sterling worker for Eastern Veterans. Taking over the onerous task of obtaining permits in 2001. At the same time there was a corresponding increase in the requirements from the police, Vic roads and councils for additional signage, traffic control and overall safe practices on our race circuits. With others in the Club Rob was instrumental in assuring that our races were conducted in the safest manner possible. He established great relations with the officers and police involved, so that the granting of our permits went through without a hitch. Rob was a willing worker for Eastern, rarely missing a meeting and always contributing to the discussion. Whenever new circuits were under consideration, he was always, you guessed it, pushing for more and more hills.

Rob was the friendly, smiling face, often greeting new riders and was always willing to pass on his wealth of cycling knowledge. Rob made enduring friendships, when I first joined Eastern I remember Royce Bennett saying to me regarding Rob and Greg Morgan, you “see one, see the other”. In recent times it has been with Phil Cavaleri, the pair of them going to the races, sometimes racing against each other and then returning home together, reliving the day’s race, another case of “see one, see the other”.

Whenever he could, Rob would join a group of us who ride into the city of a Tuesday. We are a bunch of mainly old guys, reliving past glories. Rob could have ridden away from us at any stage but would always ride with us and be alert to anyone dropping off the back and ride back to them to ensure they weren’t riding alone.

Tragically, on his way to join us on February 27, Rob was involved in a freak accident on the bike path at Eltham, and passed away at 5:51 am on March 2.
Rob passed away doing something that he loved. It is a measure of his strength of character that one of his last acts was to ensure that his organs would be donated, to give someone a better quality of life. His memory will live on in those that have received his organs, and in those of us who were privileged to have known him.

It is with heavy heart that we mourn his loss today.

By Keith Bowen, family friend and Secretary of Eastern Veterans Cycling Club.